The GIFT of a TESTIMONY or The Trials of a Middle School Teacher

While looking for something else, I came across a letter I wrote to my daughter, Autumn, when she was on her mission to Russia for 18 months. I will share it. It is my gift to you as well. That's the great thing about a testimony. It truly is the gift that keeps on giving. Little did I DREAM when I wrote it that one day I would be on a mission and that it would turn and re inspire me!

Dearest Autumn (Sister Cullen) As you may recall, I’m teaching 3rd period Choir (6th-8th grade), 5th period Recorders (6th grade)and 6th period rotation (7th-8th grade). That last class has me EXHAUSTED! Truly..it’s physically challenging having to be around such chaotic dark energy with 33 little flashes of light showing the goodness that’s accessible and then trying to catch that light and fan it into something self sustaining! Yesterday I tried to have all the teams work physically on their ootm problem. Two tables were balsa wood, one was vehicle, one was supposed to be creating stuff with rubber bands to change the wording of something, ring a bell, and sound an alarm...etc. ONLY one of me, running in circles...trying to keep people on task. Boys hopping teams, putting tracks on their heads, gluing each other with crazy glue, I finally had to shut them all down and have them clean up and sit quietly on the floor. It was CRAZY...Someone had glued the new boy’s back pack zipper closed (he speaks NO English)...it was terrible. I gave them all a talking to about how we can not have any negativity...EVEN IN JEST! This was a mean prank. They seemed to care. I let them out AFTER the bell rang. Luckily it’s a 3 day week end. I had bus duty, then came back to my room to clean up the messssssssssss....they had supposedly cleaned up..hahah! Poor Ephraim was so tired of waiting for a ride home. It didn’t help that I am on my period and am being drained of my blood and energy...hahaha. The next week after making them sit and watch youtube videos and take notes for two days I decided to give it another try. I had this really fun idea of using some industrial sized lasagna that Reg bought for a spont. Each piece is about 2.5 feet long! I gave each team two pieces of dry lasagna, a 3 ft piece of string, a clothes pin and four balloons. Their task...... Using only these materials and your pencils and notebooks, make a set of tracks that everyone is holding so it doesn’t touch the table and roll the balloons along the tracks and make them go uphill, downhill and jump a gap in the tracks. You may not touch the balloons with your hands except to place them on the track in the first place. It was supposed to be a 10 minute opening exercise. “Go” I said...they immediately started crumbling the lasagna, shredding the string, (one boy was sawing the string back and forth across the back of his chair...melting a line in the plastic.) they poked holes in the balloons with their pencils, stabbed each other’s balloon from other teams, put the balloons in their mouths, pretended they were condoms, pretended they were pregnant...one boy tied a balloon to a string and started batting it around his head squealing (I’m pretty sure he’s on the spectrum now).... I was zooming around the room saying, “Stop loves”,” tell your body no, brother”, “NO STABBING! THAT’s DANGEROUS”, “Five more minutes...FIVE more minutes...are you solving your problem?” FORTY “MINUTES later ?i rang the chime....They settled down.. “Team one, show us your solution!” Team one looked at each other accusingly. “We’re not leaving until your show us your solution.” They grabbed the rubble from their table, two students had tried to do something...they cobbled a track of sorts and made the balloon go uphill , downhill, and for the jump, one girl had put the clothespin on the string and pinched the only balloon they had left and it slid across the gap like a zip line. “Ours was dumb!” one team member lamented. “YES,” I agreed, “BUT your zip line idea was AMAZINGLY CREATIVE and that’s what we’re looking for in odyssey of the mind. Do more like that.” “TEAM TWO..you’re next”...suddenly teams 3-6 started scrabbling. I head remarks such as “You idiot you popped our balloons! You did too!, You broke our pasta! “ As they began to find a real solution each team stood and showed their solution. I was able to find ONE REAL thing to compliment on each one..miraculously. The bell rang to end school. We had two teams left. “NO ONE IS LEAVING until everyone has finished” There was an uproar. “NO I shouted above the din, you wasted your time...you’re not leaving.. they quickly settled down and teams five and six anxiously and quickly showed their “solutions”. Now the room was a WRECK...the floor looked like we had thrown three garbage cans around. “OK I announced...clean up before you go.” Now they got mutinous making comments about missing the bus, parents waiting, illegal, etc. Suddenly I realized they were going to storm out past me. I crossed my arms, blocked the door as they pushed against me and started singing “Clean up Clean up everybody everywhere, Clean up Clean up everybody do your share.” The people against me backed up in confusion. I started up again..deciding, “ I’m quitting tomorrow anyway.. I might as well go for it.” I sang louder and louder over and over and over again. Until it got so awkward for THEM that people started cleaning up, others started singing too. Some hid behind the white board trying not to clean up but I pointed to them and sang louder until they came out with confused and bewildered faces and cleaned up. Soon the floor was spotless, but I didn’t stop singing, so they stacked the chairs (AHH I thought, I’m never stacking the chairs again!)...I kept singing and suddenly one big guy folded up his table and placed It against the wall. (AHHH I thought, I’m never doing that again either!) The room was completely in order. I opened the door and let them out thanking each one....when they were gone I went to my desk and put my head down....then I got up and walked out to the car. All I could think of was...I can’t do this...they’re too untrustworthy, this was a dumb idea...we don’t have enough supplies and accountable people to help to keep everyone on task. I need THREE more tables (Custodian said there were no more tables!) some groups were on the floor! Ugh!..It was sweaty hot too. My air conditioner in the class is broken and seems to be blowing HOT air...sweat was pouring down my back like when we were in Shang Hai, China!...I got home and drank a ton of water and flopped on the couch and began praying for a good idea, anything, permission to quit, hahahah...and ZONKED out for 4 hours! I suddenly woke up from a dream. In the dream I was teaching at the X-Men school...for special children...you know, like Wolverine, Storm, invisible boy, etc. I was doing OOTM with them and they were creating AMAZING and wonderful things. I was filming the complicated machinery of some very cool balsa wood designed marble maze and complimenting the team. They were all pleased, but the energy in the room still felt chaotic like at any time the students could blast each other with fire, power, ice, etc. but they didn’t because I was there and I helped them control their powers and I was immune to their powers somehow. I was not afraid. I mentioned to someone that there was a new kid coming to class, an ice boy. I wondered out loud what a boy made of ice would look like when he walked in the door. He was as white as paper...no features, but wore dark clothes and sunglasses. “You want to know how an ice boy moves around?” He said in a belligerent and threatening voice, “Come shake my hand and you can find out for yourself!” He growled, implying that he’d use his powers on me to freeze me. I continued filming the project I was filming and cheerfully stated, “I’d LOVE to shake your hand, get over here and meet me” I knew his powers were useless on me. I woke suddenly...with two thoughts in my head...call the dads in the class and see if any of them are available to volunteer in class and help monitor each team. And TWO: Call home depot and ask for glue so everyone could have a GOOD working bottle. I called the dads that had come to my mind and left messages. I called Home Depot and talked to the manager on duty.. Her name was Lyn. “I KNOW ALL ABOUT Odyssey of the Mind!” She said (she had been involved with it in Vallejo), “Can you be here in 10 min?” Daddy Reg came with me and Lynn gave me EVERYthing I needed for FREE. We just loaded up my cart and she walked me past the cashier. As I walked out to my car I saw a man ahead of me... The spirit said, “TALK TO HIM” so I did. It was awkward...”UH Hi...do you have any kids in school?” “ No...why?” he said. “Uhhh I don’t know..I think you looked familiar” I lied. Ugh...”are you a teacher?” he asked. “Yes! “ I said and briefly explained I was looking for volunteers for my class. Come to find out. He used to be a homeless bum on the streets but had pulled himself up by his bootstraps and was now a successful marketing guy, married and had just moved to Windsor! Soon he was taking the information down to come in and help once a week! Then he asked me, “Do you believe in God?” “YES!” I answered. “I believe he asked me to talk to you.” “So do I. Do you believe in Jesus Christ?” “I am a true follower of Jesus Christ!” I smiled. “ Can we have a prayer?” He asked. “YES!” I said. So his wife and I held hands while he prayed mightily to Heavenly Father for me and my class” We had tears in our eyes...it was surreal. Then as I turned to go back into the store (Reg was still inside fidgeting in the nuts and bolts isle)..I saw a home Depot worker with a load of cardboard (flat and tubes)..”Hey, what are you doing with that stuff?” I asked..”Tossing it.” He called out. “ Can I have it?” I called...”SURE” he sounded surprised. I put it all in my suburban... I am SO ready for when school starts up again. I am not saying I think the kids will be ANY different, but I feel like the Lord is on my side and sending angels to help me. So let us see how it goes! The next morning Spring called just after devotional to tell me something cool about her English class. I told her she was SO GREAT! And Doing so well in college. “It’s not me mom!” she interrupted. “It’s the Lord. “ She had dedicated her first year to Jesus Christ. Doing all things in His name. She had written out a covenant and read it out loud in private..covenanting that if He would help her to remember and understand what she was taught and help her be a good student she would do such and such..” I was inspired by her faith. When we hung up I got out my journal. I wrote out a covenant...”Heavenly Father, if you will send angels into class with me, and help the students to pay attention and learn, and give me good ideas to help them I promise to love those students like you do.. I promise to not get offended by anything they or their parents do. That’s all I got.” I then felt inspired to make a chart...the top read “WE have respectful hearts” then I wrote the team member’s names on 6 hearts and when they settle down respectfully as a team their heart goes up and when they don’t it goes down. Each heart is on a piece of string that moves up and down when pulled from the back of the board. When 6th period came I was armed and anxious...I had classical music playing as they came in and the air actually felt CLEAR...as if evil spirits had been stopped at the door and only children allowed in the room...there was no chaotic/dark energy and the kids felt a difference and really settled down. I explained to them about their need to develop respectful hearts. How our activity the last class was supposed to be 10-15 min. and because of their disrespect to the materials and each other and me it took over the whole class! They listened. They worked and they left...I decided I could make it one more day. So that is my birthday present to you Autumn...a story of not giving up in the face of despair and exhaustion. The Lord IS on our side because WE are actually on HIS side...hahahah He is sending his angels to help you and me in our area of His vineyard and sweat is pouring down our pretty backs, and we need ICE water, but on we trudge on wracking our brains for solutions and His work will be accomplished as we are guided by His spirit! I am so grateful for you. I am grateful for the honor of being your mother. I LOVE it that you are on a mission learning vital tactics for living the rest of your life! Happy Birthday!!!